A bit of Monday morning levity. A headstone is a rather odd place to make a “statement”, no?

I recently, finally, got an iPhone. After the first few days I am experiencing the same things I did when I got my first MacBook. I knew it was going to be good, but I didn’t know it was going to be THIS good.

What an amazing device. My experience with Apple products can be summed up in the following phrase: BELIEVE THE HYPE. I came to Apple products as a skeptic, and I am now a believer.

I know, I know… I sound like I should be wearing this t-shirt:

Not quite… I’m not religiously devoted to Apple products, but their quality and innovation do inspire admiration. So unless you are a gamer, you need a Mac.

This WILL make you laugh! My favorite part is the dentist monkey or maybe the beatbox chipmunk.

What’s your favorite part?

Tired of over-Tweeters? This feathered friend shows us how to solve the problem:

Some of you would probably like to use this on me…

(via: Doug)

I don’t know if they found the answer but someone punched this question into Google and Google thought I might know:

In case you’re out there… I don’t know. But this guy might.

Cartoon by Dave Walker.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PKK-WWwcQME

(via)

This same mini-mall terminology was used in another article I read last week… oh yeah, this one.

As you gather with other believers this morning, may all your handshakes be followed with hand sanitizer…

Watch it to the end and then watch it again. You’ll laugh out loud.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zi8beYR1iBQ&feature=player_embedded

Here’s an animated version with with subs:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LgJxEfYT3Kg&feature=player_embedded

Billy handles himself superbly. Returns wit for wit without compromise. Have a look:

Part 2

Who are the prominent pastor-preachers today that can go head-to-head with a top-notch comedian/social satirist and not come out with two black eyes and a bloody nose?

Wow… is there some reason he didn’t use his OTHER foot?
(via)

From the “why didn’t I think of that” department… I guess this is the kind of fraudulent enticement – I mean “spiritual leadership” – that separates small town pastors from guys who have 10-million dollar parsonages:

From the product page: Prosperity Prayer Shawl

This unique tallit (prayer shawl) can enrich your prayer life, even as it serves as a reminder of God’s ageless desire to prosper and bless His children. The prayer shawl, features 12 faith-building prosperity Bible verses, as well as an unforgettable scene from “Autumn,” one of the world’s most beautiful masterpieces from Nicolas Poussin’s “Four Seasons” collection. The original painting, displayed permanently at the Louvre in Paris, is also known as “Spies with Grapes from the Promised Land.” By special arrangement, Benny Hinn Ministries has arranged to make this breathtaking work of art, featured on the Prosperity Prayer Shawl, available exclusively to partners and ministry friends. Literally wrap yourself in God’s promises as you fellowship with Him! Request your Prosperity Prayer Shawl for your seed-gift of $50.

Hmmm, no mention of triple blessing if Prayer of Jabez is uttered while wrapped in shawl…

Maybe you don’t need more encouragement to be neurotic about the English language… but here it is anyway: (watch)

Kevin Abell explains everything in this slick video promo for his speaking gig at my church this Saturday night (October 30th).

If you want to hear Kevin speak he’ll be here at 6:30pm.
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If this makes no sense to you, you’re not alone. You need to be from a particular ethnic background to find this humorous. Original music by my friend Sam Rempel. Video by someone Sam has never met. In fact, I texted Sam when I saw this and he had no idea it existed.

Watch it here if you can’t see the video.

Seriously, marketing department… this was the best you could do?!?! I’m sure you could have come up with a better “jeandea”.

Previous FAILs
Child Safety FAIL
Website Name FAIL

Saw this in the lobby of an apartment of some friends:

Other FAILs:

Website Name FAIL

Check out these two posts on her Facebook page yesterday. First this:

And then this a short while after…

All the tell-tale sign are there:
- Remains committed to Christ but is no longer a “Christian”
- Sees other Christians as difficult to get along with
- Refuses to be against anything
- Quits Christianity and being Christian “in the name of Christ”

Did I miss anything?

(I can’t believe I scooped this before Ken Silva got to it!)

I don’t have time today to explain all that this entails, but my heritage is Mennonite. Not Amish, just Mennonite.

So, this list modified movie titles that I’ve collected and created over the years is very funny to me and others from the same background. You may not find it funny at all.

You may on the other hand find it hilarious, want to add more, or would like to provide a synopsis of how the Menno version of the movie would play out.

Have at it. Leave a comment or email me your idea (michael.krahn@gmail.com)

THE MENNONATRIX
LEGENDS OF THE FALKS
MENNORITY REPORT
12 ANGRY MENNOS
GOODMENNOS
BRAVEHIEBERT
FULL MENNO JACKET
THE GRAPES OF VOTH
OF MICE AND MENNOS
WHO FRAMED ROGER REIMER?
MOBY DUECK
DAYS OF WIENS AND ROSENTHALS
WILLY WIEBE AND THE WARENEKI FACTORY
THE MIGHTY DYCKS
FRANZ BUHLER’S DAY OFF
THE GOOD THE BAD AND THE UNGERS
M.I.B. (MENNOs IN BLACK)
MY FEHR LADY
A FISH CALLED WONITA
YANT ZEDE STORY
WEEKEND AT BERNIE TOEWS’
CROUCHING TEICHROB, HIDDEN DRIEDGER
ONE FLEW OVER THE KOOPS NEST
WHO’S AFRAID OF VIRGINIA WIEBE
SILENCE OF THE HAMMS
LAWRENCE OF ALTONA
SHRECKLICH
GUESS WHO’S COMING TO FASPA
BIENT HUR
DYCK TRACY
THE BLAIR WIEBE PROJECT
SAVING PRIVATE REIMER
DIE HARDER (ok, that one actually got made)
A FEW GOOD MENNOS
LOEWEN STAR
A FIST FULL OF ZOAT
BEVERLY HILLS KOOP
DUECKS OF HAZARD : THE MOVIE
A REIMER RUNS THROUGH IT
THE SUM OF ALL FEHRS
THE USUAL GIESBRECHTS
A BARTCH TOO FAR
THE BARTCHES OF MADISON COUNTY
FREE WILLY ENNS
O BANMAN, WHERE ART THOU?
BANMAN (BANMAN RETURNS, BANMAN AND RUEBEN, BANMAN FOREVER, BANMAN BEGINS)
MENNONITE COWBOY